20 Nov
2008
Yep
I AM still here.
Things have been crazy and busy and stressful at times. Things are getting better and things are going to be alright.
The kids are doing relatively well, although they have no problem pitting their Dad and I against each other over even the smallest crap. We all try and chat daily about things and keep tabs on what's going on and their Dad and I do the same.
We figured out the hard way already that if we don't talk the kids will say whatever the hell they want to get what they want. It doesn't help matters that they are around certain friends that have divorced parents and they do the same thing, giving ours such great examples to follow.
I'm really hoping that since we are aware and acting on this though it will nip it in the bud somewhat.
Most people have been tremendously supportive through this to both he and I. I doubt those people will ever know how much it means to me to have that but I hope one day I can be as supportive to them as they have to me.
Others not so much, but ah well screw 'em.
I don't feel the need anymore to go into the whole thing and lists of reasons on why, why now, why not then, why not later, what for, why bother. Why, why, why.
Why don't we just all take a second to be happy that the sun shines, the sky is blue, and they now make Milano cookies that are dipped IN frickin' chocolate !
K, bye.
Comments
Nov 28, 2008
Lulu Says:
Damn Trolls. Can we fumigate up in here?
Golfing Buddy - You are brave. Stupid. But brave.
Ya see, the thing with us internet friends, we'll always have Jess' back. That's how this shiz works. We're her friends, so we're here for her. We'll say supportive things until we are 16 shades of purple, and then we'll say some more.
No one here is doubting that there are two sides to every story, or assuming that the Big D is easy-peasy for exhubs to deal with. The thing is, we don't so much care. We are here to support Jess.
Nov 25, 2008
WOW What's happened here?
So I go on to check Jess's blog only to find the "Big D" and I don't mean Dallas is in the works. WOW! Don't know what to say besides that because as long as I've been reading her stuff for years whe was either pounding out babies or giving us great lit on the happenings in the life of her girls, hubs, the hound from hell who eats the sofa and the white trash in Nebraska. Yes there are some quality folks in NE as well but through the eyes and keyboard of Jess they're more fun to read about.
Jess I knew ya since the old MS Spaces days and wish ya luck and strength. Don't like seeing anybody break up especially with all the kids but ya gotta do what ya gotta do to keep your sanity... techUnk
Nov 25, 2008
Mind Your Own
I know Jess and soon to be Ex Hubs very well. They have been together for along time, they grew up together and grew apart along the way. I am not going to be one to sit on the sidelines and point fingers and do the he said she said crap it is rediculous, and creates more drama for two people who clearly don't need it. I love them both very much and I know this is hard for the both of them and I hope that one day they will look back and know that they did the right thing! They are both hurting right now and I think that people should show a little more compassion rather than trying to start crap! Jess puts things on here to keep her readers up to date, not to say that none of it is her fault! Get your own life and your own drama if you feel that you need your fix of it that bad don't try to make more for others! <3 you know who!
Nov 25, 2008
Golfing buddy ?
Jess' hubs doesn't KNOW many of us to recognize us, and you do ? Sounds to me like you're full of shit.
Nov 25, 2008
Golfing Buddy of Hubs
I heard hubs was getting slammed on here and had to weigh in.
It's a shame that Jess is upset and running away from her problems. If she would have spent more time confiding in the man she married instead of always complaining to others (I recognize a few of you who post here) maybe she wouldn't have a broken marriage.
Hubs has put the clubs away. It wasn't the links that was the problem.
DC
Nov 25, 2008
mississippi
Sorry bout that, got a little trigger happy becuase i was pissed
Nov 24, 2008
Hey MISSISSIPPI
I AGREE WITH YOUR POST but please quit typing in all caps. You're shouting at the rest of us.
Nov 24, 2008
MISSISSIPPI
HEY MISS MANNERS
WHAT GAME ARE YOU PLAYING,THIS NOT A SCORING GAME I HAVE KNOW JESS HER HOLE LIFE AND I HAVE KNOW HUBS QUITE A WHILE TOO,THIS IS NOT A WIN OR LOSE GAME THIS IS REAL LIFE. MAYBE THERE IS A BIT A JEALOSY IN WHAT JESS AND HUBS HAD, IF YOU WHAT TO PLAY THE ODDS LOOK AT YOUR OWN LIFE.THERE IS 6 KIDS THERE TO DO WE GIVE HANDYCAP POINTS FOR THEM? WAKE UP AND SMELL THE COFFEE. I WISH THE BEST FOR ALL OF THEM
Nov 23, 2008
Nancy G.
Did I spill some borracho beans? Sending you fabulous thoughts on your birthday weekend m'dear ~ U get the whole bag of choco-dipped Milanos. Oh and I think your wonderful talent at writing - and I'm sure many other things - will ensure that you'll have plenty to share with the world no matter who "makes out better in this" :/ It's not a contest. Shared child-rearing, though separately, will be a challenge for everyone. But you can look back on this 5-10 years from now just out of curiosity, y' know...just to see. Wishing everyone well there.
hugZ Jess & Happy B-Day! ~N
Nov 23, 2008
Yeah I bet
He'll have more time to play golf than ever before!
Meanwhile, Jess will be surrounded by the strength, respect & love of her children, not to mention most of the work in raising them, while "the Mr." books more tee time.
The comment right below mine seems to be trying to stir up more trouble. Don't let the vulture trolls get to you Jess. Like you said, screw 'em. My thoughts exactly.
Nov 22, 2008
Hey Miss Manners
I do know "hubs" quite well (and have for a long time). He's going to make out a lot better than Jess in this.
Nov 21, 2008
Midlife Crisis Unsolicited Advice Provider
Sell crazy someplace else, we're all stocked up here! I sincerely doubt you're going to change Jess's situation and in the meantime you're invalidating her feelings. Do you know the intimate details of her life? For that matter, do you know Jess or ex-Hubs personally? You are making assumptions based on your experiences, not hers, and we all know what they say about assuming; move on and go find someone else to harass (and annoy).
Nov 21, 2008
Sarah Says:
Glad to see you're still around and making it through. Hopefully you'll be around a little more from now on.
I SO need to find some of those cookies.
Nov 21, 2008
MISSISSIPPI
YOU GO GIRL, HAPPY BIRTHDAY
LOVE YA
Nov 21, 2008
Happy Birthday
Happy Birthday!
Nov 21, 2008
I Found This In A Brochure. It Helped Me.
Understand that the divorce due to midlife crisis is not because of the relationship. So providing comments to the midlife crisis spouse that you think are being helpful can actually cause more harm for the left-behind spouse.
These can include:
• “Only you know what is best for you and your kids.”
• “You and the Mr. will never be the best parents you can be unless you both are happy.”
• “You deserve to be happy and should do something about it now while you are still young enough to enjoy
it.”
• “Life is too short to be unhappy.”
• “Just love yourself, and your kids and you will find your way.”
• “People do not change.”
• “I know you have your kids’ best interest at heart.”
Nov 20, 2008
Surprise
I'm surprised you as open as you are about it. Though you have let us in on several parts of your life before. It sounds like you are doing your best, and that is all anyone can hope for without cheating. Silly kids. They do know how to work the system, don't they? -Proto
Nov 20, 2008
Nancy G.
Alrighty then! Good to hear Jess ~ and stress would be there regardless sometimes, whether you guys live in the same house or not. You both share a large family, and it sounds like you've done everything you can and STILL will, and that's the best thing for the kids. In all respect, just be glad you and the Mr. are still young. 10-20 years down the road, you'll both have alot about your kids' lives to share, even if separately.
Yeah them kid games ~ me & my sisters had a blast with that sh!t. And our mom saw right through it, so she was onto that quick. Ya'll's kids will learn what they can & can't get away with, sounds like they are already.
Stay strong Jess, there will be times when neither you or the Mr. will feel that way, that's only human. As mentioned, the high road is the best, I think also. Hard to do sometimes.
Damn, I didn't mean to write an essay there, like I know what I'm talking about or something -- sorry. Pass the Milanos dipped in choco and I'll share this box of dark choco Dove ice cream bars. Hot as hell down here. Send us some cold willya? It's freaking November 20th already & I'm tired of running the A/C. ;) your bud ~ hugZ ~ N
(Oh hey I was reminded -- it's your birthday tomorrow young lady, 29 & holding again)
:P
Nov 20, 2008
Lulu Says:
So, the whole kids saying whatever it takes to get what they want thing.... If you and their dad keep the lines of communication open that behavior will all but stop. Vern's kids tried the same thing. Once they realized that their paretns would call each other if things sounded fishy they knocked that shit off real quick!!
Nov 20, 2008
WHAT?
The now have Milano's dipped in chocolate? Are you fuggin kiddin me? Hot Damn!
BTW, glad you are still here!
Kat
Nov 20, 2008
DonniTeamMOAP
Hey Jess!
Glad to see your still here Jess =) hang in there and I like the point you make about the milano cookies Mmm cookies!
www.moap.us - My Omaha Area Portal-Free Memberships
Nov 20, 2008
Good For You
You know how I feel. No one should have be miserable for any minute of their life.
I'm glad you and hubs are working through it together and not against each other.
Nov 20, 2008
Keep your chin up. It is
Keep your chin up. It is always better to take the high road with this. The kids don't need a parent to trash talk about the other. You are doing the right thing. The kids will remember what was said about the other parent, and will end up disliking that parent some time down the road. They hear and remember more than you think. I'll always be here for you. Keep up the good work.
Gma
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